old men with NO bounderies!

I don't know about you guys but what is up with older men in Italy, obviously i expect the youngens ( and i use young in the BROAD term 16-50 ) to say things or look at us females but I have had several instances where elderly men have asked me out or "fell" on me ie : groped.. and its just weird and gross. I was taught to "respect my elders" and if someone ( old man ) starts a conversation on the bus, i am polite but its almost always followed by "esci stasera" or "di dove sei" or "sei fidanzata".. i dont mean to be rude but why would I at 25 be interested in a 75 year old pensioner? Perhaps all of berlusconi -esc films where the old men get the hot foriegn girls... gross..

its sad when you prefer the old ladies who demand you get up from your seat or step on your foot on purpose! one time i got wacked with an umbrella lol

sounds familiar................it's better outside the main centres. with 3 kids noone even looks at me anymore (accept in pity!)

Luckily I haven't experienced the really elderly pervs, I usually attract all the gross foreign guys though, especially when I lived in Rome. If I was on a train the creepiest guy would ALWAYS find me and sit next to me, even if there was a hundred other seats available. I do not miss public transportation!

haha jessica , i do unfortunately have to take public transportation and that ALWAYS happens to me. the guy that gets on the bus an everything shrinks away from or changes seats to avoid always manages to bother me.. its like a science..one time when me and my boyfriend were on the bus there was this eccentric guy who we saw several times as he lives nearby, for some reason he had made eye contact with me ( just a fleeting second ) but it was enough for him to head toward us even though i was clearly with my bf. Right before we got off the bus he says to my bf "take her clothes off, if you don't ill do it myself" .obviusly he was clearly insane but wtf?!

what u r doing wrong is that u are not sending out the right message; it is not enough that u have a boyfriend... u have to send negative vibes...u need to practice being hostile, no eye contact, and always look like u r extremely busy...cell phone, book, and put all your bags on the spare seat next to u. Do not look like a tourist. Or alternatively get on the bus ranting and raving and preferable smeling of pee and no one will go near you!

I tend to visualise a big thick barrier round me when im on the bus with spiky bits sticking out of it and if you imagine it hard enough people seem to sense it and move away! heehee

Lizzie wrote: get on the bus ranting and raving and preferable smeling of pee and no one will go near you!

haha

i have been trying the "evil glare", i have that down pat. Sometimes when I get a good song on my ipod and the corners of my mouth drift upwards.. problems arise! LOL. il have to pee on myself and talk to inanimate objects next time.. good trick lol

once at the station i saw a little-person lift up her skirt in full view of everyone and squat and pee. All of us at th bus stop instantly bonded over that.. afterwords she pulled up her skirt got on the next bus that arrived and introduced herself to some poor stranger on the bus.. fun times!

one time I was on a bus (but this was in the uk). there was a bloke sitting innocently minding his own business and the guy behind him just vomited all over him. you never saw a person whip off his shirt so fast (luckily he was yummy!) I often wonder what I would have done it it had been me! GROSS!!
Another time I was queuing for a bus (obviously this was the UK, as Italy does understand the concept) and the guy in front just punched the driver in the eye, there was all blood coming out. I removed myself from the queue and got on the next bus. Seems mean I didn't stay as a witness, but there were about 20 other people and I had a 2 yr old in a pushchair!
Anotehr time I got on a bus and this guy was holding broken glass, so I jumped off at the next stop...oh the joys of public transport.
Did you read the article on www.theamericanmag.com where the driver virtually kidnapped the last remainding passenger and took her on an (un) joy ride?
happy happy happy!

I was walking down the street this week with my son in the pushchair.. a big pack of nappies and all the shopping etc.. dripping with sweat. As I passed the local bar (which permanently has 10 old men outside it) this guy of at least 75+ said "Nice Tits!" (Che belle tette) WHY?? just keep it to yourself esp when my son repeats everything at the moment.

oh jennie that is so crazy! the thing about italian old men that disgusts me is not so much that they are pervs, but that they actually think they have the right to degrade women, the right to intimidate women, and they actually think women would be into them! They are really a sad lot. And i think its so sad that they have given this example (through tv also) to the younger male generations. It just baffles me how presumtious the Italian male is in general. They treat you like you'd have nothing better to do than spend time with them or even looking at them. And even my husband is presumtious about things like housekeeping and getting the food cooked... it's hard to find anyone here who respects women.

Anyway, i'm sure it's worse in the big cities. I spent only 30 days in Firenze back in '97 and I definitely met a lot more weirdos than I do in my small town here.

I always have that "no, i don't like you" face when I go out though.

Eeew! Yes there are pervs everywhere but I kind of got the feeling (back before I had a kid and everyone started to call me 'signora' and treat me with respect) that the pervs here think foreign women are particularly available. I'm very tall and blondish so I really stand out as a foreigner and I used to get victimised by these types a lot. Also I used to do silly things like wear shorts when it was 35 degrees out. Silly me.

Anyway I was reminded of how awful it used to be a couple of months ago when I was at a bar in Termini with my husband and baby in the stroller. I went up to the bar to order drinks for us all and some guy came up and put his arm around me and said some unprintable things. I pointed out that my (oblivious) husband was 2 metres away but that didn't seem to embarass him at all. Ugh.

That's creepy, but that's Termini for you....!

My grandfathers cousin who is 96 years old has a habit of cupping my boobs whenever he hasn't seen me in a while. Then he gives me that "come sei bella". That's when I have to go to my happy place so I don't haul off and kick his 96 year old, wrinkled ass.

giovanna wrote:My grandfathers cousin who is 96 years old has a habit of cupping my boobs whenever he hasn't seen me in a while. Then he gives me that "come sei bella". That's when I have to go to my happy place so I don't haul off and kick his 96 year old, wrinkled ass.

age as an excuse for bad behaviour. when i am 96 and see a beautiful young man, can i go up to him and cup his balls??? why are dirty old men socially acceptable????

I seem to think that boundaries are an issue here all together. Even old women have patted my breasts during a greeting. It's very odd. I'm wondering if big boobs represent something like good health. Or maybe folks here in the village are just way too horny and look to cop a feel whenever, and where ever they can!!!

Giovanna[url=Mi Chiamo Giovanna]www.expatsinitaly.com/giovanna[/url]

Maybe its just lucky to pat your boobs!! you should start charging you could make a fortune lol

Wow that is truly weird.

giovanna wrote:I seem to think that boundaries are an issue here all together. Even old women have patted my breasts during a greeting. It's very odd. I'm wondering if big boobs represent something like good health. Or maybe folks here in the village are just way too horny and look to cop a feel whenever, and where ever they can!!!

Giovanna[url=Mi Chiamo Giovanna]www.expatsinitaly.com/giovanna[/url]

oh my goodness that is funny. the part about the village. unfortunately, i know what you are talking about even though it hasn't actually happened to me... these small-towners, however, in this area of the country, are very interested in your body... how much weight you've gained, how big or small your boobs are, how your clothes make your butt look, etc.... they seem to think it's their business

I have a story for this thread!

A while back when I was living in a small town outside Rome and old man approached me whilst I was sitting on a bench along the passegiata eating an ice cream.
"Mangiona" (I guess this would be 'greedy guts'!) he says to me
"Er, yes" I reply
"Will you come for a little walk with me?" he asks
"Ummm, where?" (I guess I should have said "no" straight out but was shocked by the question)
"Just a little walk" he continues "come and stay with me for a little while"
I start to get up and leave
"Please" he begs "I just want to stay with you, can I stay with you for an hour?"
I walk very, very quickly away.

And this happened in broad daylight when I was wearing an office outfit! Can you believe that just because I look foreign and wasn't about to shoot down with a look anyone who dared speak to me like most girls here I was taken for a prostitute?! Boh!
I now live in the city where I always wear my 'faccia cattiva', but I never would have expected something like that in a small town.

http://ramblingsfromrome.blogspot.com/

what a lovely story...makes me feel all fluffy

Makes me VERY happy to live in the big, bad city. I don't think I could cope with all the danger and sleaze in a small village.

I grew up in Toronto and I have always been told to this day that I have the perfect "Don't fuck with me expression". I have no idea what exactly it is but it works for me! I am tall and blonde and I hardly ever get harassed on the bus or train.

Once, a crazy guy started to yell at me in French whilst on the bus in Genova and I was on the phone with my husband, I screamed in English as loud as possible, "Go away you freak and stop bothering me can't you see I'm on the phone!" Everyone on the bus turned to look and the guy walked away. My husband laughed and said "Yep, you'll do just fine without me!" haha

oh wow, these are great, these last ones!!! so hilarious about the small town frankie - i can just imagine it. really, small towns have a lot of twisted freaks just waiting to come out from under their rugs there are a few here!

definitely have to have that DFWM look from day one in this country! I have had that look since I was a kid... so haven't had much trouble here

i love your story too leah - i can just picture it.