Help! Attending a wedding in Veneto 1 May

Ciao Ladies,

My husband and I are (hopefully) flying into Milan next week for a month-long stay in northern Italy. We will be meeting many Simionis we have gotten to know on Facebook, although none are related.

One family has even invited us to a wedding! So, now, besides "come hungry", I want to bounce off some questions.

The wedding will be at a church in the morning. Then there is a very nice luncheon at a villa http://www.villa-garbinati.com/mappa.htm

We are not invited to the formal luncheon as it is small(er) and was full when the bride asked us to join them. But we are invited to come back in the evening for music (DJ) and "refreshments".

What to wear! What to give!

Those are my main questions.

We are packing VERY light -- and I plan to wear a skirt with a nice top & jacket. And some sandals. But not dressy. I am pretty sure this will be alright.

Regarding what to give, a couple of people have mentioned 100Euro per person is a typical gift. But, others have said we could just give 100E for the both of us as we are not going to the formal event.

We are bringing a couple of small items from the USA, which leads me to another question (and another post?) about what gifts should we bring to people's homes.

Any suggestions?

Grazie for your help.

Nancy
(possible future expat!)

Hi Nancy-

What you're wearing sounds perfect. If you're going to the mass the most important thing will be no bare shoulders! But that only applies during the mass itself!

You see a lot of variety in what guests wear to weddings in Italy. Everything from evening gowns to jeans (young guys). Here, especially with men "expensive" equals appropriate, I don't quite get it... oh well. The majority of women would be in a dress or skirt, sometimes a pantsuit.

As for a gift. Yes, €100 per person attending the wedding is standard. Of course a gift of that value is also acceptable. However, you're right, this amount relates directly to "thanking" the couple for the invite by basically paying for your meal. Guests who cannot attend the wedding (or like in your case wont be eating) adjust down. With our wedding, guests who were unable to come generally gave us around €50/per person invited.

I know you're packing light. But another suggestion for you would to be to bring a gift from America. Some things, like silver picture frames, candlesticks etc. cost a fortune here. Three to four times what you'd buy them for somewhere like Macy's or Nordstroms. Therefore you could spend the equivalent of €50 and have the appearance of having been much more generous. But I'm cheeky like that .

If you'd like I'm happy to share a link to my wedding album, you can get a look at what guests wore. I know I was really nervous about that before I went to my first wedding here!

Carrie, that's awesome. I appreciate the tips.

We have decided to bring one checked bag now since I already have so many gifts. So, your suggestions are very helpful.

I asked if the bride's registry was online and her cousin laughed. Saying "no. this IS Italy after all!" (her cousin is currently working in NYC).

Yes, I'd love to see your wedding photos!

My email is usanancy@gmail.com

Grazie!

Nancy

Ciao Carrie, and gals,

Ah, just checking back in, a year later!

Mostly I spend a ton of hours on facebook -- chatting, reading, and posting about Italy! Meeting and partying and sometimes even studying with our new Italy-loving friends here. We can't believe how many people we've met who are planning trips to italy --- but, I guess that's to be expected from our Italian classes.
Anyway, my husband and I have been having a blast!

Last year's trip was absolutely incredible. Everyone was so warm and friendly.

We had fun at the wedding by the way! Especially when I got the DJ to play "California Girls"! We'll meet the bride & grooms soon-to-be-born bambino this time!

Next year: Return to Rome (for MY 60th birthday this time, we went for my husband's in 2009), and then explore south.

Hope you are all doing well and enjoying Italy (except for those dirty old men I was reading about!)

NANCY
San Diego, California
On Facebook: Nancy Nicholson Simioni